A Promise Worth A Lifetime
by Itachilova101
Summary: He's going to die. Because this is what he really wants... because I promised him this. SuzakuXLelouch YAOI


A/N: This is my take on the ending of Code Geass... yaoi style! XD

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"_Suzaku, I want you to kill me."_

I had been so good at hiding my emotions. Yes, this was the man that had killed Euphie; this was the man who had murdered millions of others, this was the man who had used his Geass to enslave countless others. But still... this was Lelouch.

Shirley had told me that nothing was unforgiveable, but that wasn't quite true. I would never forgive Zero for killing Euphie, but I could forgive Lelouch for becoming Zero, couldn't I? Especially when he was standing in front of me, asking me to help make atonement for becoming Zero in the first place? Even if that wasn't possible, no amount of hatred could stop me from loving him.

"_You have to promise."_ I was so good at hiding the pain of those words slicing into my heart.

But now, here I stand, moments away from the time when you will board the vehicle, go out into the streets and meet the fate you chose for the benefit of the rest of the world. Here I stand, before you, on the verge of tears as you smile knowingly at me.

"Please, just..." I whisper, but I can't finish. This is what you really want and I had promised you this. There was no turning back from this point onward.

You take a step forward, then another and then one more. You stand close to me as we stare into each other's eyes in front of the Emperor's throne—the throne that is supposed to belong to you. And then you reach over with your hand and you wipe away the tears brimming in my eyes.

"Nunnaly will miss you." It's the most persuasive argument I can come up with and I almost think it did its job when tears welled in your eyes, too.

"She'll have you to care for her now," you whisper, your voice wavering, "You will be a wonderful big brother to her. Much better than I have been lately."

Unable to control myself any longer, I launch myself at you, wrapping my arms so tight around you that you're probably choking and kissing you so hard there will probably be a bruise. But you don't seem to mind. When our lips part from each other, I bury my face in your shoulder and I say, "I will miss you."

Your arms wrap around me and you hold me just as tightly as I hold you. It's hard to breathe, but I don't mind. "Just look at the new world that you helped to create. Look at all the smiling faces and the laughing children. Listen to the people call their homes by their rightful names instead of by a number issued from some foreign government. Look at it and you will see me there."

I choke back a sob and I hold you even tighter. "Lelouch..."

"Suzaku..." You chuckle and whisper only half-jokingly, "Calm down, we want the crowds to see me die, don't we?"

I want to shout at you that it is only you who wants this, but I can't. Because this is what you really want and I had promised you this.

I reluctantly loosen my hold on you and you take a step back. "No!" I cry and grab hold of your arm.

You smile at me and I can see the fear in your eyes, but you quickly force it back. You chuckle again and use your free hand to caress my cheek. "Let me go, Suzaku," you whisper so quietly.

"No!" I shout again, only holding the arm even tighter, "Don't be a martyr! Please, you could just step down from being Emperor; Nunnaly can take your place! Please, you don't have to die!"

"Yes, I do," you correct me, "This isn't just for the world, this is for me, as well. This is my atonement. How could I allow myself to live a long and happy life remembering all the lives I cut short?"

"You could because I asked you to!"

You shake your head and lean forward to place a tender kiss to my forehead. "I'm sorry, but even Geass can't grant you that wish."

I choke back a sob and rest my head on your shoulder. My shoulders shake with the sobs I'm holding back and, even with your hands placed on them to try and calm me, I can't stop.

"You promised me, Suzaku... please keep your word." And, with that, you place one last kiss to my head and then step back, out of my reach. You place a hand over the Zero mask and close your eyes, as though blessing it and then you board the vehicle that will lead you to the fate you chose for the benefit of the world.

Because this is what you really want.

"Lelouch..." I whisper, going over to the mask and putting it on. I turn and I head out to the fate that you chose not only for yourself, but for me, as well.

Because I promised you this.

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A/N: I cried when I watched the final episode. And I'm not talking about a few little tears, I'm talking Lee's Waterfall tears! I had to keep quiet so I didn't wake up my parents! But it's my firm belief that Lelouch is alive somewhere.

He has to be! I mean, yeah, his death goes with the entire storyline of the plot, but it's still not so cool to make me cry like that!

I don't cry easily... -.-"


End file.
